


Water Before the Faithful, Blood Before the Unbeliever

by TheGeekLord



Series: Jailbird [3]
Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Azazel is made of awesome, BAMF Charles, Charles in a Wheelchair, Erik Logic Is The Best Logic, Erik has Issues, Erik is not a Happy Bunny, I think he's BAMF, Kinda, M/M, don't listen to strange men Erik, listen to your husband, they don't give good advice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-27
Updated: 2016-08-27
Packaged: 2018-08-11 10:45:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7888243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGeekLord/pseuds/TheGeekLord
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Charles had been hurt. Maybe Nur was right, maybe his family didn't want him anymore. Charles had been hurt. Maybe it was better for him to be in prison with his own ilk, he couldn't do that much more harm then, could he? Charles had been hurt. They would be better off without him. Charles had been hurt and it was all his fault.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Water Before the Faithful, Blood Before the Unbeliever

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a while guys, sorry about that. And sorry in advance for this installment, possibly not one of my best but it needed to be done. I'm sorry if you're offended by any representations in this fic, and feel free to PM me and I'll sort it out right away! (My tumblr is at the bottom of the page).
> 
> Enjoy =)

They told him about the crash, but not much more than that. “Charles has been in a car accident Erik; he’s going into surgery I don’t know anything yet.” “He’s out of surgery now Erik, he’s okay we’re just waiting for him to wake up.” “Charles won’t be able to visit for a while Erik; Edie is staying at the house to look after the children while he’s is in hospital.”

Never any elaborations, never anything more than the bare minimum that he needed to know. They probably though it would be better that way, that he wouldn’t worry too much if he didn’t know every little nuance of Charles’ treatment. Maybe it would have been better if he was told anything more than that Charles was alive. For days after Raven had gotten the message to him he hadn’t known the extent of the damage. Didn’t know if he was going to make it.

His life had narrowed down into three distinct facts. Charles hadn’t visited in months. The children couldn’t visit. Charles was hurt and it was all his fault.

The third was purely extrapolation on his part, but it had grounding if nothing else. Charles had never been targeted for anything before. People loved him, from the moment they met him he charmed them effortlessly. It was Erik who people took time to warm up to, who was often the afterthought when he was invited to social events and the like. Erik didn’t mind though, Charles made him not mind. He was always the plus one, always made sure people knew exactly how important they were to each other. Even back in university, where Erik was nothing but a surly engineering student who had difficulty making even passing acquaintances, and Charles was a social butterfly with the biggest heart he had ever seen. Why would he be targeted now after all their years speaking out? Why now, when things are reaching their pinnacle for Erik, would Charles be hurt?

It was obviously something to do with him, with his case and his freedom. Charles deserved better, he deserved not to be burdened by Erik anymore.

Which was exactly what he told Azazel the day before visitation, when his Charles was meant to be seeing him finally.

“What the fuck?” Azazel growled, looking every bit the menacing mobster he was. “No seriously, what the fuck are you talking about you dumb motherfucker?”

Erik heaved out a long sigh, “The lawyers have been deliberating for months now Az and for what? What could possibly be taking them so long?” He placed the tin gently between them on the bunk, careful, as though it could explode any second. “I don’t think I’m getting out”

“But have you considered just how much of a huge, incestuous fucking web legal shit is? Your case has been moving faster than I’ve ever seen. I don’t know what kind of mind-fuckery your husband can do, but you have been on the fast track for months. Hell I don’t think my lawyer’s even read my paperwork yet.”

“No offence but your lawyer is state funded, they’re going to be lagging. Charles is paying so much for as expensive a lawyer as he can buy and still nothing. Don’t you get it? He’s driving himself into the ground” Erik growled, fingers raking through his hair, gripping hard enough to hurt. He could feel the rage rising again, the past him that only Charles had been able to soothe. The longer he spent inside, the more he could feel himself changing, become more of the man he used to be all those years ago.

“You are rich though, are you not? Don’t you have an estate?”

“It’s not about the money. Sometimes I think the Xavier wealth is bottomless. Don’t you see? It’s about me. I mean yes Charles’ inheritance can only last so long, and with the children and the legal fees and the time he’s having to take out of work he’s going to bankrupt himself,” he pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes so hard he saw stars burst, “But not before he runs himself into the ground. Charles has such a big heart, but right now he needs to focus on getting better and there are the little ones to look after and” he stopped, took a shuddering breath. “I should never have left them” he croaked.

Not that he wasn't fiercely proud of Charles, hell no, he was so achingly proud he could barely contain it. He felt it bubbling up inside him, pouring so strong from his very core that he was surprised no one else could feel it. Could see how strongly he ached for his family, how he burned for Charles' touch. He missed them. He missed them so bad he feared his heart would never unclench, that the fist in his chest would squeeze tighter and tighter until there was nothing left. But he couldn’t be a burden, not again, never again. If Charles needed to cut himself loose then he would let him go. If it was safer to love his family from afar then he would gladly take that step.

Wrapped up in his misery as Erik was, the last thing he expected was a sharp slap to the back of his head.

“Pull yourself together asshole” Azazel growled, though a grin was trembling about his lips “You have a beautiful family and you have hope. That is more than many of us. You think I have anybody waiting and fighting for me? No my friend, I have my sentence and then I have whatever comes after. You have a life Lehnsherr, and a reputation. Live up to them”

“But the accident-”

“Was an accident. Okay, _maybe_ there is some huge conspiracy and the person responsible for your incarceration actually orchestrated some reason for Charles to be visiting with your lawyers so that they could target him on his way home. Or _maybe_ your husband was driving late at night and a car ran an intersection and hit him and it’s devastating but it happens. Erik come on, you have a family, don’t let paranoia take them from you”

“Fuck you” Erik cursed softly. Then slowly, like a lightbulb warming, a grin broke out and spread across his face. “Fuck I do, don’t I?”

“Yes asshole, you do. Now shut the fuck up and let me snoop through your things in peace”

\--- --- ---

Visitation day dawned for Erik with a leaden weight in his stomach, pulling his nerves taught as piano wire. ‘What ifs’ chased themselves around his head, faster and faster until their meanings began to blur. This was it, make or break time. Did he listen to the doubt that gnawed in his gut or did he shape up and become whatever Charles needed him to be?

The decision was easy when it came down to it, a non-question in fact. Of course if there was any chance of a life with is family after this then he would take it. Family had and would always be the most important thing in his life. His mother, who did everything she could to raise him right, even though he wasn’t a good child. Charles, whom he loved more than he could and would ever be able to articulate, the very cornerstone of his life; and of course their perfect, precious twins, who he would gladly give his life for.

There was no question, he would stay with Charles for as long as he was wanted. 

The waiting was the worst part. He liked to stay near his cell, so when they came for him he could hear them clearly. He was always paranoid that he’d miss his visit.

The first hour passed in a rereading of old letters.

Then the second.

By the third Erik was just about going out of his mind. Charles was never late. Granted, between his work, the children, and fully booked visitation days, their time together had rarely been consistent. Some weeks Erik would worry himself that he was just too brusque this time; that he had walled off too far from his family. But then another visit would come and everything would be fine and dammit if he wasn’t _trying_ to be better.

But it was supposedly the day Charles wanted to visit and he wasn’t here.

Worry ate at him like starving creatures in his belly. He felt like at any moment they would gnaw straight through the core of him and all the fear and panic would come sliding out amongst the blood and viscera.

Why wasn’t he here?

Had they forgotten about him? Had Charles finally seen the light? Had he used their time apart, unable or unwilling to talk or visit, to come to the decision that Erik was bad for all of them?

“Why so glum Lehnsherr?” A voice cut through his musings, young and far too cocky for where they were. Warren Worthington III, supposed rebel son of rich parentage, was leaning in the doorway, smirk fixed to his permanently smug face. Erik disliked him intensely.

“The fuck do you want, Worthington?” he said, sliding the tin back out of sight.

“So touchy, whatssamatter? Someone tell you your rep don’t mean shit anymore?”

Erik wanted nothing more than to punch that arrogant grin straight off his face. Instead he levered a glare and his intruder.

“Alright fine,” the kid acquiesced, palms up in a mockery of surrender, “the big man wants to speak with you. I’m just here to check you haven’t got your junk out or something.”

With that the kid was gone, laughing away at his own joke like it was the funniest thing he’d ever heard. Erik was so thankful that Charles had not ended up a typical rich boy.

His reprieve wasn’t to last, however. Following almost immediately on the kid’s heels was probably the last person Erik wanted to talk to, or in fact be seen with.

He called himself En Sabah Nur, though Erik couldn’t quite fathom why. He must have been born something else, but rumour had it he’d changed his name by deed poll years ago. All he knew was that he’d been inside for a long time, longer than anyone could remember at any rate. Passed from prison to prison, the higher ups obviously wanting no part in his incarceration. Rumour had it he low-key believed he was the reincarnation of some ancient and noble god. All Erik knew was that he wanted to steer clear from him at all costs. That guy was bad news, and if there’s one thing he’d learned from all of this it was do your time and get out, don’t take shit from anyone else.

“Erik Lehnsherr, it’s a pleasure to meet you at last” he said with a smirk, leaning casually against the doorframe. It wasn’t even a faux casual display of aggression, he seemed to truly believe he was welcome.

“What do you want?” Erik growled, mustering as much of his fabled aggression to wrap around him like a protective cloak.

The sooner he got the guy to leave, Erik knew, the better off he’d be. With Azazel off ‘preparing for Erik’s imminent departure’ he was truly alone with this maniac.

 “No need to be so hostile, I’m here to help you.” He smiled an old, indulgent smile; the sort Erik would level at the children when they were being difficult.

He wished he had a better self defence mechanism than just growling “Fuck off”, but preparing for this particular inmate’s brand of crazy was not something Erik was well-versed in.

The old reaction it elicited in any case was a saddened tutting, and a slow, almost unconscious head shake.

“Now that’s no way to treat your guest is it?” He gave Erik a disappointed stare, as if Erik was a child in need of discipline.

“You’re not my guest Nur, you’re not anything.”

“I’m here to offer you an opportunity Erik, you’d be a fool to throw it away.”

“And what exactly is it you think you’re offering me?”

“Join me as one of my trusted advisors. I’ve been looking for someone like you for a long time, Erik, someone with your strength and commitment.” There was a fervent look about him, he seemed to be almost shaking with conviction.

“Fuck off.” Erik snarled, backing away immediately as Nur strolled into his cell like he owned the prison already, and stood looming over Erik. He seemed suddenly twice his size, and so much more intimidating.

From up close the dedication was even more evident, something in the lines around his eyes. His face was ageless in a way, he seemed permanently to be teetering toward the wrong side of middle aged, and had been for as long as anyone remembered.

“Listen to me Erik,” he sighed, voice almost breathless with excitement, “your skills shouldn’t be wasted on this moping. You are better than this, embrace this life.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“There is nothing for us out there Erik, amongst the slumbering masses. It’s time they awoke and saw who really owns this world.”

Erik could feel his passion like a wave, spreading over him. The most terrifying thing was that much of what he was saying made some kind of twisted sense. The numbers of oppressed and underprivileged in society far succeeded the well-off. If they gathered, then the system could be put to much better use. In truth he could feel a tiny seed in his heart, the age old grief over his father’s death, his mother’s hardships, it wanted to agree with this man. Wanted to march alongside En Sabah Nur as an ally and free everyone the system pushed down. It terrified him.

“And that would be?” He scoffed, sarcasm his typical line of defence when uncomfortable.

“Us. We are the superior beings. Don’t you see? We have taken the next step. We have chosen to reject what society spells for our future and embrace the deviance in the hearts of men.”

Nur sat himself down next to Erik, who had to fight not to scoot away. He was getting through somehow, playing him like a fiddle until his weaknesses were fully exploited. 

“Look, I don’t understand a word of what you’re saying and to be honest I don’t really want to.” He tried to focus his mind elsewhere, away from the unsettling knowledge that the propaganda he was being fed was only a step away from what he truly believed. What he fought for, and what Charles, no matter how much conviction he held, would never fully grasp. And where was Charles already? Why hadn’t a guard come to collect him yet?

“Think about it. We are in the majority here, we who believe that these laws put in place are nothing more than a way to control us. We can build a better world Erik.”

“In prison?”

“It is our beginning yes, and from there we can spread out message, move traffic in and out of our gilded cages. Build an empire atop the brick and mortar that once held us captive.”

“You want me to what? Help you plan a prison break?” Erik scoffed, a frankly futile attempt to put the lunatic off, to distance himself.

The grin that spread across his face was almost terrifying, full of mindless fanaticism. “I want you to help me liberate this place. Attica, Erik, if we riot we can take control.” He all but sighed in pleasure at the thought.

It made Erik’s blood run cold. “And look at the fallout from that. I can’t be a part of that, I won’t” he said, pushing himself away. He couldn’t put himself in here for longer, his family needed him.

“This is the dawning of a new age, a time of freedom for our kind. We can burn this structure to the ground, build something better from its ashes.”

“I’m sure you can, but you can do it without me. What use would I even be anyway?” Erik deflected, wildly looking for an escape route. The rage inside, so long held at bay, was rearing its head once more and Erik feared this time it would cost him everything.

“You’re here because of a riot. You know how to inspire crowds of people.”

“I’m here because some asshole fucked up what was meant to be a peaceful protest.”

“Was it though?”

“What?” Erik hadn’t thrown the first punch, would never, not when his family could get hurt. Family was one of the few things Erik cared most about in this world.

“Was it truly meant to be peaceful? I’ve seen men with hearts like yours Erik, men whose rage is their strength. Are you sure this wasn’t your way of finding liberation?”

“No. You think I want to be stuck in here? That anyone does?” Erik could feel the anger rising, anger at himself more than at any one specific thing. He could have guessed something like this could happen. And Charles, did he even want the protest to happen? Or did Erik force him because of his own fanatical devotion?

“Why would you want to leave?”

“Unlike you I have a life outside of this place. I have something waiting for me.” He sneered, a last ditch attempt to save face and rid himself of his unwanted guest. Nur’s truths were hitting a little too close to home and he knew it.

“Of course, the husband who never visits and the children who are young enough not to care.” His tone was light hearted, but there was a glimmer of something dangerous flickering in his eyes.

“I don’t have to explain anything to you.”

“Was it an accident Erik? Is that why he isn’t here?” At Erik’s refusal to grace him with a reply, the smile only spread. “Ah yes, and did he tell you himself? No? He went through a proxy didn’t he?”

“Don’t you try and turn this around on him” Erik growled, though the edges of panic and doubt were creeping in.

“Erik, do you really think they’ll welcome you back after this? That you’ll run into their open arms and everything will be what? Normal? There is nothing out there for us Erik, no way back into society. You’ll become a burden on your household you know. Another, bigger mouth to feed on just the one paycheque, because if you think anyone will take you back after you’ve been inside then you’re more naïve than I thought.

“I have a job waiting for me.” It sounded as much like he was clutching at straws as it felt. He knew, deep in his heart, in the long buried place, he knew that Nur was right. That even out of prison he’d be nothing but a burden to them.

“Do you? Do they know you’ve been in prison, do you think they’ll trust you the way they used to? Do you think anyone will?”

“He’s a friend, he understands.” Charles had promised he would understand.

“Maybe he will, but what about the other people under his employ? I presume there’s a board, what will they think? Just watch, first the promotions will bypass you, then opportunities will dry up, then they’re downsizing the department. Soon it’ll be back here again, and maybe you won’t get another chance like this.”

“I’m not starting a riot for you.”

“You wouldn’t have to, just get the people to listen to me. If you shake the foundations of their worlds, I can show them a better way.”

“It’s not worth it.” The excuses were becoming that much more brittle each time he rejected the idea. It would be so easy to give in. So easy to let go and help people the way he wanted.

“You would rather risk everything you worked so hard to gain in this place on a bunch of outsiders who have probably forgotten about you already? Or hope you’ve forgotten them.”

“I can’t. I won’t. I’m not ending up in solitary.”

“Solitary won’t exist, none of this will exist.” Nur swept his hands as he talked, a grand gesture to encompass the prison as a whole.

“I can’t, please I-”

“Erik.” He stretched the name out, tone chastising, as if bargaining was far beneath him. “This isn’t the man I heard tale of. Has your family made you so weak? Have they really twisted you into this pathetic creature? Why sit here alone Erik? Are you waiting for this husband of yours to finally come calling so you can run to him like an obedient lapdog?”

“It’s not like that” Erik protested, though it wanted to die in his throat.

“Isn’t it?” Nur pushed, though his voice was gentle.

But what if it was true, all of it. Everything he had, all hope for the future rested with Charles but what if he didn’t want him back? What if he was happier alone with the children? What if he’d found someone new, someone who wasn’t as fucked up as he? Maybe the lawyers were moving so slowly was because there were none, he knew first-hand how much Charles hated letting people down. Maybe that was his plan all along, to leave Erik in here and slowly detach himself, until the break was clean, almost surgical. Cauterise the wound as you go, seal off every eventuality.

If Erik’s heart was breaking, he wouldn’t have to see it at least. He could move on. And it’s not as if suicide rates amongst convicts were particularly low. Erik would become just another statistic and Charles could finally be happy with his life.

“It won’t work, not spontaneously. There are too many regulations in place” Erik sighed. If this was to be his fate, then a life in prison was better than nothing. Better than explaining to his mama why he doesn’t bring the twins over anymore.

“I need your alliance Erik; the planning can begin at a more appropriate time” Nur said with another grin which did little to put Erik at ease.

“I-” he was interrupted by a sharp whistle from outside the cell.

“It’s time for me to go” Nur said with a soft smile, ever the benevolent leader. He stood swiftly and strode toward the door in one fluid movement, “but I’ll be back to talk to you about this later. And then he was gone, and Erik was once again alone with his own thoughts. Thoughts which battered and crashed like a raging storm inside his tired mind. Screw visitation, he just wanted to sleep.

Not two minutes later Officer Summers appeared in his cell, gruff as ever and ready to take him to the visitation room. That must have been why his unwanted caller took off so fast, rumours only grow after all.

“Lehnsherr, visitation” Summers growled, when he made no move to follow. He didn’t wait, just turned on his heel, leaving Erik to scramble and join.

Erik liked Summers, a grey haired ex-soldier who took shit from no one and could tell stories that put the shits up anyone fool enough to listen. Erik had long ago made a promise to himself that as soon as he was released, the first thing he’d do was find a way to improve Summers’ arm, a fantastic work of engineering but in desperate need of a few tweaks.

Prosthetics were the furthest thing from his mind, however, as he took the long walk toward visitation. Summers was as chatty as ever, which is to say he maintained a stoic silence, not because he felt he was better than any of the inmates, but because he couldn’t care less about anyone’s bitching.  It was honestly refreshing, though it did little to settle Erik’s nerves.

The walk felt endless, like he was being taken to his execution. Maybe he was. It certainly felt like he was going to die. He was drowning, burning up from the inside. He was choking, something cold and hard like dread lodged in his throat. His hands wouldn’t stop shaking, he was sweating. He was going to be sick.

And then they were there. Then it was time. Charles.

He spotted him as soon as he entered. Thinner than the last visit, with a face visibly more drawn, skin stretched taught over bone, but it was still the same Charles. He was at a table near the back of the room, talking quietly to Raven and looking possibly more nervous than Erik ever remembered him being. It did nothing for the tension simmering in his gut, the conversation with Nur buzzing around his skull like a hornet’s nest. But he was actually really there in the room. Erik could scarcely believe his eyes. 

It was Raven who spotted him first, interrupting their conversation to point Charles towards toward the doorway where he stood. The smile that lit up Charles’ face was blinding, chasing away the shadows that crept back around his eyes. The closer he got, the more he could see how drained Charles looked. Faded cuts still left their marks like constellations across his face. He made as if to stand, like for a moment he had forgotten all about the wheelchair he was folded into. His face crumpled for a second. It tore at Erik’s heart.

He closed the gap in seconds, cupping Charles’ face in his hands and kissing him for all he was worth as soon as he was within reach.

“Charles” he sighed, a breath across his lips. Muttered it again, because he could. “Charles I was so worried. No one would tell me what happened and I couldn’t speak to you.” He paused, bashful, tracing the backs of his fingers across one flushed cheek. “I thought you weren’t coming.” A murmured confession.

“I’m so sorry love” Charles pressed into another kiss, “it takes a little longer to get ready than I’m used to.”

Erik sighed his name again, half out of relief and half worry. He nuzzled him softly, large calloused hands covering Charles’ as they pressed against his cheeks, and holding them tight as he pulled back from his grasp and slipped into the seat opposite. 

“I wanted to talk to you sooner but it was so difficult and I didn’t want to tell you over the phone.”

“Charles calm down, I’m sure Erik understands” Raven cooed, smoothing a hand up and down Charles’ spine, as she stared disdainfully over at him. Charles looked distinctly uncomfortable, the tension in his body cranking tighter at the touch.

“You know I love you Charles, I wouldn’t want you do to anything that hurt you in any way.” Erik skimmed a quick kiss over Charles’ knuckles. Ravens eyes narrowed further.

“It hurt me not telling you.”

 “You were worried that I wouldn’t love you anymore?”

“I really messed things up old friend” Charles murmured, fingers picking softly at their intertwined hands.

“Charles no” Raven started to protest, but Charles interrupted, softly in the way only Charles could. So you felt bad for talking over him.

“Raven darling, you know I appreciate everything but could you just leave us for a minute? Please?”

Raven threw a glare toward Erik, as if he had spoken and not her own brother. “I’ll be with the guard or something Charles, just call me when you’re ready to go”

“Okay thank you sweetheart.” She leant over to give him a kiss on the cheek, levelled one last look at Erik and then sashayed out the door.

“I’m so sorry” Erik whispered once she was out of earshot.

“What do you have to be sorry about love?”

“It’s my fault.”

“It’s the drivers fault. If you must blame someone, blame him.”

“If you hadn’t been going to the lawyers”-

“Then I could have been going anywhere. Erik please”

“I’m sorry”

Charles gave a wet chuckle, eyes shimmering with tears. “Stop apologising. None of this is your fault.”

“How are you otherwise? Are you feeling any better?”

“To be honest not really.” He sighed, looking all at once so much paler, “I’m tired Erik, I’m so tired of the hospital and the fussing and this bloody chair. You know I love her but Raven either flat out ignores it or mothers me like I’m an invalid, and I can’t tell her to stop because she doesn’t even understand she’s doing it. There are still some days she just pretends like everything is normal and it’s not.”

“Does it have to be?”

“What?”

“Nothing is going to be the same Charles; we knew that from the beginning.”

“I’m sorry Erik but this has nothing to do with you. I am in this chair for the rest of my life and I’m bloody done with everyone telling me it’s going to be alright. It’s not Erik, and I am sick and tired of it being all people see when they look at me. It’s like my entire life, all of my achievements mean nothing because now I can be pitied and I fucking hate it. I know who I am, and I know I’m lucky to be alive. But don’t I have a right to be sad at what I’ve lost?” he cut himself off with a gasp, pressing a trembling hand to his eyes with a shaky inhale.

“I’m being a prick aren’t I?”

“Only a little” Charles laughed, wet and teetering on the edge of a sob.

They settled into an awkward silence, as Charles struggled to swallow back tears. Erik ran his quivering fingers over and over their hands, swallowing his own impending breakdown back.

“How are the kids?” he asked, welcoming any subject change he could muster.

“They miss you. They don’t quite grasp what’s happened I’m afraid, but they’re being awfully good about the whole thing. They know not to run off upstairs without telling their Oma Edie.”

“Is she with them today”

“She’s staying with us for a while, to help me with the children. At least, she is until we find somewhere new.”

“We always did say that mansion was too big for the four of us” Erik said, trying so desperately to bring some levity back to the visit.  

“I wanted to move more people in, not move us out”

“I know but this can be a fresh start for us, shake off what went wrong before and start anew”

“I’m going to miss it though.” The tears the had been threatening finally spilled over, fat droplets trickling down cheeks just that bit gaunter than the last time he remembered.

“It’ll still be ours Charles, it’ll always be ours” Erik choked, eyes burning with the effort it took not to let himself cry too. Oh how he wanted to, how he wanted to curl up and bawl like he was a boy, weep for everything Charles has lost.

“We’re not here to focus on me Erik” Charles said at last, wiping his eyes, putting on a brave face. Erik could easily imagine it was the mask he painted himself daily.

“You’re all I want to focus on”

“You’re a sap.” Charles gave him a watery smile, red rimmed eyes still enchanting in their endless blue.

“Don’t go telling everyone, I have a reputation to uphold after all. Those PTA mums will never look at me the same way again. It would be a scandal Charles.”

“They haven’t seen you cooing lullabies in German to our babies at three in the morning.”

“You’re not supposed to have either”

“I have pictures”

“Charles”

“I will blackmail”

“I’ll tell everyone about your motorbike fetish” Erik said with an endearingly shark like grin, showcasing entirely too many teeth.

“It’s not a fetish, you just looked hot”

“It is so a fetish”

“I love you”

“Doesn’t stop the fetish”

“Erik” There was a waver in his voice, as if he needed the reassurance but didn’t know how to say it. As if he thought that somehow Erik wouldn’t feel the same.

“I love you more than life itself Charles” Erik cut him off, so matter of fact that Charles couldn’t help but give another wet laugh.

“I know, but I always enjoy reassurance.” He looked away, eyes fixed on their hands.

“When I get out of here I’m gonna show you how much.” Erik hooked a finger under his chin, guiding his head up so he would be able to see the truth of it.

“Erik.” Another warning, his eyes darting everywhere but in contact with Erik’s.

With a soft huff, he abandoned the bid for eye contact, and instead pushed a stray lock of hair back out of Charles’ face. “I’m gonna redecorate the new house because you’re gonna hate it but you don’t want to ask mama for help.” He murmured, trailing fingertips down one cheek. “I’m gonna bring you breakfast in bed every morning.”

“Every morning?”

“You bet. And I’m gonna take you out to dinner wherever you want to go because you deserve to be spoilt and I miss being able to do that.”

“You can do something for me right now if you want” Charles grinned with a seductive flutter of puffy red lined eyes.

“Oh yes?” Erik leaned across the table, intrigued smile creasing the lines around his mouth.

“You can say you’ll take the job offer and get Tony off my back”

“Charles” Erik sighed, leaning back into his own space.

“Erik,” then softer, “come on darling you deserve it”

“I barely deserve to think about Stark Industries, let alone work there straight out of prison”

“You know he wanted to promote you before all of this right?”

“What?”

“Kept telling me how he needed an actual competent chief engineer to bounce ideas off. Said he got bored in R&D all by himself”

“But”

“Just say you’ll take it. For me? Just say you will”

A sigh. “Okay”

“Okay”

“But you have to help me”

“Oh yes?”

Erik took a deep breath before launching into what was still only a half formed notion rattling in his bran, as if he was scared that stopping would make it all go away. Charles knew exactly how that felt. “I want to do something when I get out, something for people like me and Az. This guy was talking to me earlier about how we’re better than they tell us we are. How we don’t deserve the treatment we’re given and honestly I think he’s right. Not about taking over the world, the guys frankly insane, but about us and how we’re treated. I know some guys, good guys, who either won’t get out for years on trumped up charges or else have nothing to go back to, no jobs, nothing. I want to do something for them, help them at least readjust”

“That’s very noble of you Erik.”

“I’d screen them first, you know, got a feel for who needs it and who doesn’t and who is likely to cause trouble but that could have been me. If it weren’t for you Charles I would be in the same position, I’ve been so scared that I will be. That you’ll decide you’re better off without me.”

“Oh Erik.” Tears welled afresh in his eyes.

“It’s okay love, I understand now why you couldn’t call. I just wish I’d known more than the bare minimum at the time”

“Raven was supposed to tell you.”

“I don’t know why she isn’t fond of me right now but don’t take it out on her. I wouldn’t trust me either, not if I were in here. Especially not now”

“We can make it through this can’t we?”

Erik brought the hand he was holding up to his lips. “Till death us do part Schatz, I’m with you for as long as you’ll have me.”

“Then let’s get you back to me where you belong”

\--- --- ---

Azazel was waiting for him when he returned, which he was both glad and sorry for. On the one hand his long awaited visit with Charles was so emotionally stressful that he wanted nothing more than to sleep for a week. On the other, Charles had put the niggling worries that had gripped him to shame, and he had never felt lighter.

“So how was it?” he asked as soon as Erik stepped foot in his cell.

“It was what it was”

“Come on Erik.”

A smile broke out unbidden across his face, the sappy kind that hugged the curves of his mouth and dug groves into the corners of his eyes. “Good Az, it was really fucking good.”

“And Charles is still alive?”

“Yeah, a little worse for wear but good.”

Erik flopped back on the bed, dislodging Azazel from where he was sat perched on the end.

“And still your husband?” He smirked and punched Erik hard on the hip in retaliation.

“Yes. We’re moving to a smaller house, something wheelchair accessible for him”.

Azazel winced. “The crash?”

“Yeah.”

Erik folded one arm under his head and stared at the ceiling, enjoying the comfort of Azazel’s silence. “I just wish there was anything I could do you know, some way to reassure him without putting my foot in my mouth.” He said with a deep sigh.

Azazel leaned back onto his hands, one leg crossed over the other, head leant back.

“Don’t baby him, don’t ignore him, don’t treat him any different than you did before. Know that there are some things he isn’t going to be able to do but don’t expect them. He’ll thank you for it.”

Erik rolled his head to watch Azazel, eyebrows climbing the longer he spoke. “How the fuck are you so wise?” he chuckled, jostling him. “Did you take something whilst I was gone? Some kind of smart pills or something?”

“Fuck off. I used to date this girl back in the day, Silhouette her name was.” He gave a deep sigh, lost to the memory. “Her flat took a while to get used to, but she wouldn’t take shit from anyone about it.”

“Used to?”

He grinned a little sadly, staring down at his lap, watched his foot tap against thin air. “I got sent here, she quit the crime business. It probably wasn’t meant to be I mean she was way out of my league.”

“Did you get your heart broken?” Erik cooed, voice on the edge of a laugh as he nudged Azazel again with his folded leg, almost unending him from the bed.

“Fuck. Off. It’s alright for you mister married with two kids.”

“I’m blessed. I know” he did laugh this time. It felt good, after weeks of worry to finally be able to.

“Are you going to stop fretting that he’s going to leave you anytime soon?”

Erik sniffed, turning back to face the ceiling with an air of fake grace. “I don’t fret. Teenagers fret. I quietly panic.”

“I wish your panicking was quiet” Azazel muttered, grinning over at the affronted look on his face.

“Shut it”

“Speaking of.” He turned a kittle, hooking one knee onto the cot so he was facing Erik. “I hear you’ve been making friends today”

“What?”

“That cult guy? Nur or whatever. I hear you’re one of his crew now.” There was an edge of concern to his voice, one that immediately put Erik on edge. Since his talk with Charles he’d all but forgotten all about the crazed fanatic with delusions of grandeur he’d been cornered by.

“Oh fuck” he groaned. “Fuck that guy.” He wanted no part in anything that would part him from his family for any longer.

“So you’re not?” The relief was almost palpable in the quiet relaxation of tension around his shoulders.

“Dude wants to fucking riot. Thinks we’re the future of mankind or some shit”

“Okay yeah he is even weirder than I thought, and I spent the morning with that toad-faced guy”

“The one who eats flies?”

“The very same, you know he’s very light fingered. Might come on handy one day.”

“I could see that. I’d still keep an eye out for that Nur guy though. Who knows what he’s plotting?”

“He’s never going to get anywhere. Besides you’re gonna be out soon probably and you won’t have to worry” Azazel joked, although there was something about it that fell flat. Some melancholy that pulled at Erik, made him consider the half thought out plans he’d sputtered to Charles.

“Yeah speaking of” he started tentatively, suddenly deadly nervous for how he would react. Somehow, though he wouldn’t be able to pinpoint when, Azazel had become a friend, the closes one he had if he were being honest. Their easy camaraderie was the one thing he could see himself actually missing.

“What?”

“How do you feel about large mansions and/or children?”

“What the fuck?” Azazel stared at him as if he had grown another head. It was a left field question to be fair on him, and Erik could probably have phrased it better.

“I just” he huffed, annoyed at his failure to bring to mind exactly how he wanted to phrase it. “We can’t live at home anymore and I know Charles doesn’t want to see it go to shit. What if you move in, when you’re released I mean? And we could help you look for a job, I mean it’s not as if Charles isn’t swimming in connections, everyone loves him. And Raven might help if she ever decides I’m not the worst mistake my husband ever made. What do you say?”

“Are you serious?” Azazel looked dubious, but there was something in the settling of his shoulders and the tone of his scepticism that spoke of relief.

“I want to make sure it’s looked after, it’s important to us.” The more he spoke, the more his excitement for the idea grew. “Maybe you can be the first of the strays we move in.”

“What are you planning Erik?”

Erik grinned, that large terrifying grin. “Something big Az, something to make my husband proud.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for your patience. I know it's been forever since I updated, but third year of uni is every bit as hard as they say it is. Anyway, here's the next installment and I hope you liked it!
> 
> As always, if you want to scream into the void with me and see if anything screams back, come find me on [tumblr](http://thegoodshiphannigram.tumblr.com/)
> 
> If you like what I do, and you want to spread love and cheer to artists (or commission more of this series) you could always [Buy Me a Coffee](https://ko-fi.com/X8X29ZNH)


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